It’s been a year since we lost Michael Jackson

It’s been a year since we lost Michael Jackson
Who still has a rabid fan faction.
He was a hit-maker
But I’m a head-shaker,
I just don’t understand the attraction.

Talk about your wild record breaker!

Talk about your wild record breaker!
At Wimbledon, it's a “take-the-caker”,
An 11-hour match
Before one could dispatch.
Why, they scored more points that the Lakers!

Hooray! The U. S. is advancing!

Hooray! The U. S. is advancing!
It’s time for the singing and dancing.
Even I can beat Ghana
With my aunts and my nana
After giving the French team a pantsing.

U. S. females are licking their lips

U. S. females are licking their lips
For the next Twilight movie – Eclipse.
Those hunky vampires
Will be igniting fires
In their eyes, in their hearts, in their hips.

The Prez says he’ll make BP pay

The Prez says he’ll make BP pay
To which I must reply, “Hooray”.
‘Cause when I’m buying fuel
And I spill, I’m the fool
Who picks up the tab right away.

I admit it. I’ve got World Cup fever.

I admit it. I’ve got World Cup fever.
South Africa, I am a believer.
Ignore all the needles
For the giant dung beetles.
They beat Vancouver’s inflatable beaver.

Let’s hear it for good old BP

Let’s hear it for good old BP
Who’s giving its oil away free.
Get your son and your daughter
And scoop it out of the water
And pour it straight into your Humvee.