I don’t really mean to be churlish

I don’t really mean to be churlish
So I’ll mention it without a flourish;
But shades of Dan Quayle –
A comic’s Holy Grail –
Did Sarah Palin really say “squirmish”.

Upon his release, Milton Street

Upon his release, Milton Street
Embarked on an amazing feat.
Just months out of prision,
Persuing his vision
To become Philly’s first Mayor / Tax-Cheat.

T. Milton Street, he former state legislator and brother of former Mayor John Street says he plans to challenge Mayor Nutter in the May 17 Democratic primary election. Milton Street, sentenced in 2008 to 30 months in federal prison for three misdemeanor counts of tax evasion, was released to a halfway house in June and then to supervised release in November. Street said his time behind bars made him more aware of the issues offenders face. He estimates there are 300,000 ex-offenders in the city. He hopes to use them as a political army to confront issues like crime, unemployment and poverty. – Philly.com – February 8, 2011

There once was a writer named Parker

There once was a writer named Parker
Whose stories are lighter and darker.
Beantown’s favorite son;
Crime scribe number one;
And a top punctuation marker.

Tribute to Robert B. Parker

Old Western gunmen Cole and Hitch,

Old Western gunmen Cole and Hitch,
Each a sharp-shootin’ son of a bitch,
Are always ready to fight
For what they feel is right,
Going wherever gives them the tich.

There once was a P. I. named Randall

There once was a P. I. named Randall
To whom, very few can hold a candle.
She was charming and tough,
Surely no powder-puff.
There is little that she cannot handle.

There once was a police chief named Stone

There once was a police chief named Stone
Who started where fast balls are thrown.
This former shortstop
Is one hell of a cop
Who rarely, if ever, sleeps alone.

There once was a P. I. named Spenser,

There once was a P. I. named Spenser,
Ex-cop, ex-boxer, not a fencer;
A well-read gourmet
Who always saves the day
And makes the Boston bad guys tenser.

Let’s have some cheers all around.

Let’s have some cheers all around.
The government won’t be shut down.
Now, we’ll never see
How great it could be
Without those politicos around.

The electorate is no longer sedentary

The electorate is no longer sedentary
The Tea Party’s got us all hyper-awary;
Up from the grass roots
Giving liberals their boots
As a Fox News wholly-owned subsidiary,

I beg of you Roger and De

I beg of you, Roger and De
Please, don’t take my football from me.
Messrs. Smith and Goodell,
Without the NFL
I’ll spend more time with my family.

Sunday’s match was anticipated highly,

Sunday’s match was anticipated highly,
With two rivals battling not al all shyly.
Neither side would yield,
But, even on his home field,
Obama lost by a point to O’Reilly.

Let’s hear it for the Green Bay Packers,

Let’s hear it for the Green Bay Packers,
Like burly blacksmiths, like annealers,
Led by Big Aaron
They did it again,
Confirming they’re football’s big wheelers.

Super Bowl XLV
Green Bay Packers - 31
Pittsburg Steelers = 25

Brett Favre has retired again

Brett Favre has retired again
This time, until God knows when.
He’ll have more time to send
Dirty texts to his friend
And a dramatic comeback to begin.

McRib, that amalgam of pork,

McRib, that amalgam of pork,
Caused the champagne to uncork.
Since the 4th quarter sales
Has increased into gales
To fill Good Ship McDonald’s jib.

January 24, 2011: Christian Science Monitor - McDonald's Corporation, the world's biggest hamburger fast food chain restaurant, saw 4th quarter 2010 sales and profits rise thanks to the McRib, Caramel Mocha drinks, and some other new items on the menu.

Got the post holiday blues?

Got the post holiday blues?
Here’s a cheer-up plan that can’t lose.
Resolve this, my dear,
That in this new year,
You’re going to stop watching the news.